Getting Jiggy With It

Today, as you know (repetition… grrr…), was/still is Wednesday. That means, oh boy, Wednesday Club! This week’s edition was even more fun than I thought it would be, which I kind of thought was impossible.

We got Vitamin Water and sour gummies and dark chocolate kissables from Giant, then headed over to our usual spot at the library. After a bit, somebody got the magnificent idea that we should go outside (that sounds sarcastic, but it really is not- this was pure brilliance). Some construction workers were out there working on this nice little area, complete with benches and plants and a terrifying statue of a man reading a book to two children. It was nice outside, not very hot and not very cold, which is how I like it.

While there, we did a variety of jigs, including one that Daniel named the ‘Jew Jig.’ I just now realized that it would have been perfect timing to say something along the lines of, ‘we are getting jiggy with it,’ but I thought about it too late, obviously, considering Wednesday Club is over for this week.

Anyway, the color of the day is middle pink (most boring color ever), the number of the day is three hundred seventeen, the holidays are Receptionist Day and Dance Like a Chicken Day, the words of the day are claptrap (a pompous or pretentious talk or writing) and doozex (the Zs that symbolize sleep in cartoons).

I do not know whether I mentioned this on here yet, but my cactus finally started growing! Remember the false alarm? Well, that is over and the real, fantastically adorable cactus sproutling has arrived. Gee, is ‘sproutling’ not a fantastically adorable word?

Anyway anyway anyway, I am now going to write a short story (and I mean extremely short, or at least I plan it to be) about the personifications of Tomorrow and Today. This story will be told from the point of view of Today.

[I never should have agreed to go out with Tomorrow. My friends warned me that relationships beginning online rarely work out. They told me that I should not even bother with a dating site when there were plenty of perfectly nice days around. Real days, not fantasies dreamed up by pathetically lonely days such as myself.

But, unfortunately, I paid them no attention. I logged into DazedDates and proceeded to search for a date, using keywords such as bright, kind, and interesting. Oodles of results came up, but one in particular caught my eye. There was a listing for ‘Tomorrow.’ No last name, just like me. I guess that was what drew me to him, the fact that we had something in common. Tomorrow’s description claimed that he looked forward to the future. Hmm, I thought, this looks like my kind of guy.

I sent Tomorrow an email asking him a few questions about himself, and he replied almost instantly. He told me I could just call him Tom. Tom and I chatted for a bit, and I found out that he was kind of like me. For one, he said that things always let him down, but that he tried not to let that get to him. I knew exactly what he meant- I always find myself worrying about the here and now, rather than what could be.

In the end, we planned to meet up the following day at a pasta restaurant. It turned out that he lived right down the street from me.

I was really excited for my date, let me tell you. I felt like me and Tom really had a connection, you know? Like he really knew me.

I was so excited, in fact, that I arrived at the restaurant a little early. I brought a magazine with me and read it, trying to look casual while I waited for Tom to come.

Unfortunately, he never did.

I was furious for a while, but then I realized that maybe something terrible had happened to him. Imagining all of the gory possibilities, I rushed home and emailed him promptly.

Like the first time, he replied right away. “Where were you?” I asked him.

“Sorry,” he answered back. “I wasn’t able to come.”

That was it. No reason, to explanation, no nothing.

This comment only served to anger me even further than before. I logged off and sat there for a while. Once I was done fuming, I set up another lunch date with Tom. But, once again, he did not show up. And, again, the same response. “Sorry. I wasn’t able to come.”

No duh, buddy. Obviously you were not able to come, or you would have been there.

After the fourteenth time he did now show (hey, I was desperate), I decided to stop contacting him. There was no use in making up a fantasy person- like Tom, they would never be dependable.

I guess I should have listened to my friends- the internet is no place for meeting people.]

Well, that was longer than I expected it to be. Then again, stories I write usually are. I can never come to a conclusion without leaving out too much.

Wow, only twenty-something days left of school.  The horror.

I am going to read now. Farewell, good humans.

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